I can’t wait to leave.

So today has been interesting.
I went to kohl’s and bought a new bra and pair of underwear. Yippee. That’s not exciting though.

Complications have arisen with my return to Columbus.

Originally, my friend was going to pick me up from the airport and let me stay at her apartment for the night. Then my ex offered both of those services, so I told my friend not to worry. Well today I found out that my ex can no longer house me for the night. So I asked my friend if it was cool if I still stayed the night…well she had already changed her plans. Now I have to coordinate between the two of them when my ex has to leave and my friend needs to be available.

Ugh. I feel like a horrible person for being so flaky and making my friend’s life so much more complicated. I know she’s not gonna hate me or anything, but I hate having to coordinate and plan and that’s what this situation has made me have to do.

I also tried to Skype with my ex tonight (his suggestion) and it was a super fail. The connection kept crapping out on us. Neither of us could hardly get a sentence in before the video feed would cut out and the connection was lost. Ugh.

It has been a slightly frustrating night.

Oh, also, my ex is in the process of quitting smoking right now. He was complaining of the fatigue he felt from it tonight. But he said, if I still smoke, he’ll probably bum cigarettes from me. I don’t know. Interesting tidbit of info I thought. I don’t think he’s really committed to quitting just yet.

I also decided to buy some new exercise clothes from amazon tonight. Let me tell you, I have never felt more guilty about a purchase than I did tonight. It’s just really hard spending my money when I know I’m supposed to be saving for my apartment.

I mean, I can rationalize it by saying that I did kind of need new workout clothes. I don’t own very many right now, and since my new year’s resolution is to go to the gym more, I need something to wear. And I’m one of those girls where, if I don’t have something cute to wear, I just won’t go. So my purchases are justifiable.

And I did budget my purchases to make sure I still had enough money to make the deposit on an apartment. I still feel bad though. My parents are freaking out so much about the cost of an apartment, it makes me feel guilty for not being like that. I’m not worried, but they seem to be, so then I get worried about the fact that I’m not worried. Ugh. So complicated.

But hopefully all the clothes fit and I like them and I won’t have to deal with the hassle of trying to send them back. I generally hate buying clothes on the Internet because you can’t try them on, but the normal stores you buy exercise clothes from just don’t offer what I want.

I also bought a book of like, buddhist children’s stories. I don’t know. I only bought it because I wanted to get the free super saver shipping. We’ll just file it away under the “for the future” category, not that a children’s book wouldn’t have valuable lessons for an adult in it. I do dream about having kids one day and teaching them about Buddhism and stuff. It’s a little fantasy of mine.

Oh well.
That was my day.
Tomorrow is my last day in Augusta thank god. I’m so ready to leave and get back to Columbus. There’s a reason they call my hometown “Disgusta”. So tomorrow will devoted purely to packing and getting ready to leave on Saturday.

Sometimes I feel guilty for 1) not wanting to come home and 2) when I am home, not enjoying my time here. But it is what it is. Like I said, Columbus is home now. I don’t really have any friends left here and I hate living with my parents. We get along much better when we don’t have to share the shame living quarters. I mean, I’ve never really been homesick before. I don’t know if I ever will be. I just like being independent and not having to be accountable to someone all the time. It’s very freeing.

But that’s my post for the night. I don’t have much else to say, other than Saturday can’t come fast enough.
Nighty night.


Musings about Bohemian Style

Alright. I did nothing today except go to the grocery store. And spent a couple of hours looking at clothes on amazon.

I have such a conflicting fashion sense you know??
I dress in business attire and/or church appropriate clothing for class, because I feel self conscious if I don’t look professional. Yet, there’s like an inner hippy inside of me that longs to wear oversized ponchos and baggy clothing.

I don’t know. I spent most of my time on amazon today looking at variations of harem pants (I’m slightly obsessed) and things labeled “bohemian”. It’s not that I have a problem with that style, that I think it looks bad or anything, it’s just radically different from what I normally wear and I don’t know if I would be comfortable in it.

I mean, my current wardrobe makes a few subtle references to that which is “bohemian”. My tunic shirt and my current pair of harem pants are covered in paisleys. I’m also slowly adding long dresses to my wardrobe as well.

Literally, ever since about 9th grade, I have had a fascination and love for bohemian style. I’ve just never felt comfortable pulling it off. I’ve never felt I had the personality or the right body type to pull it off. I always imagine “bohemian” being wore by a waif thin girl with no curves, a girl who is a giant “eco-freak”, maybe someone who smokes too much weed. I don’t really fit that stereotype. My entire life has consisted of tight, fitted clothes. Baggy or loose clothing has never been acceptable.

I did go through a period where I wore a lot of loose fitting shirts, but in the last couple of years I have moved away from that towards very tight clothes. I don’t know. Perhaps it is time for my style to go through another evolution??

I guess the biggest problem with dressing bohemian, I hate the color brown. And that’s the main color I think of when I think of “bohemian”. I have slowed started to incorporate a few brown pieces into my wardrobe; you know, a pair of brown sandals and brown heels, a brown belt, all dictated by necessity. I really hate the color brown though. I could never have an all brown wardrobe. Can bohemian be done in black I wonder??

I don’t know. This is a very random topic. I’m just thinking out loud I suppose. As much as my self-confidence has improved over the years and I have learned to wear what I want regardless of what other people think, there are still things that cause me to hesitate. And it’s the cheapskate in me too. I’d rather spend money on a tested and true clothing item I know I will wear, rather than something “risky” that may just hang in my closet.

Of course, no one says your wardrobe has to be cohesive. I could dress fancy one day and bohemian the next, but I just like to try and look similar throughout each day. I don’t like extreme fluctuations in outfits. I feel like it makes me look flaky or something. I don’t know. I’m sure most people don’t pay that much attention to this sort of stuff, especially in college where the only people you’re likely to see everyday are your closest friends.

Ah well. These are just musings. I’ll probably waste the rest of my phone battery looking at clothes on amazon, dreaming about being hippy chic. Haha.

Tomorrow is our annual get together with my dad’s side of the family. That should be interesting at least. It’ll give me something to write about tomorrow I suppose. Hopefully all goes well and the cake I helped my mom make tonight tastes good.

Good night.

Discovering my Passion for Fashion

So I have this other blog I started at the same time as this blog. It’s called Pinterest Love and I update it daily with a picture I find on pinterest. Lately most of the pictures I’ve been posting have been fashion related, and they seem to get a decent amount of attention.

I’m really starting to consider turning that blog solely into a fashion blog. Blogging about my favorite outfits has really unleashed a passion for clothing that I didn’t know I had. Not only could I post pictures of outfits, I could post hair and makeup tips along with commentary on the hottest styles and cheap alternatives to expensive looks.

Maybe I’m tooting my own horn but I think I have a really good sense of style, and I know fashion is something people want to read about.

It would give me an excuse to buy the latest fashion magazines like Vogue and Nylon and others. It just sounds like something really fun I could do. Whenever you google “blogging tips” they always say to blog about something you’re passionate about. Clothing and fashion is something I feel strongly about; who knows, I may even have a passion for it!!

What do you think??
I think it sounds like an awesome idea (maybe because I came up with it), but I really think it could develop into a passion. I need something to keep me busy up there in Columbus. Haha.

I could make business cards!! 😝


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